March | 2006 | NOT KEEPING SCORE 2006 March | Taking no prisoners. Including herself.

March, 2006

Coming Soon:

03.27.2006 by Shannon

A status report on Project Slinky, Year25, and what’s ahead for Not Keeping Score. Currently, catching up on much-needed rest… [zzzzzzz]

(In the meantime, you can waste a few hours)

Category Announcements | Tags: | 3 Comments
blow, girl, blow!

03.22.2006 by Shannon

it’s that day…

Category Announcements | Tags: | 2 Comments
Fuzzy but Deadly

03.21.2006 by Shannon

[Cue violin strings]

As I say good-bye to the first half of my twenties, I find myself reflecting on what I’ve done with my life for this first quarter of a century [lolling trumpet]. Have I accomplished all I said I would by this age? What will I set out to do in years to come? I think of all the amazing folks that have graced my days, some still part of my present, some only as part of my past [symphony swells], and others I see gliding into my future. I think about the meaning of life [trilling peaks], and how that meaning has changed as the years rolled by and experiences left me bruised or stronger or more confused or more content.

And the most valuable nugget of wisdom [piano chord] I’ve been able to capture has been that life is a hell of a lot like a rabbit: it looks awfully cute and cuddly, but that fucker has sharp-ass claws [cymbal].

That’s why you throw a slinky into the mix — to render the whole thing beautifully absurd, wonderfully ridiculous, and therefore much, much easier to tolerate [enter clown on unicycle playing slide whistle].

(Don’t forget to slinky!)

[Special thanks to R.T. for the image]

Category Slinky | Tags: | 2 Comments
Church of Denial

03.20.2006 by Shannon

I have had a couple of inquires as to whether I went to church this past Sunday. I don’t know how to answer this.

I mean, “church” is such a loose term, really. So I didn’t make it to an “official” mass… I did attend a meeting of the Church of Denial. Counts, right? Worship included shameless procrastination of otherwise immediate tasks, reckless unacknowledged imbibing, perpetual over-stimulation as avoidance technique, and complete denial of the fact that I was in denial. It’s part of the membership.

I do, however, have a fabulous story to tell from my Church of Denial ritual; a tale of the high seas, near-death experiences, dolphin sightings, sailboat fetishes and life-saving leg warmers. Trust me, it’s a good story.

But I can’t tell you. As part of my new-found religion, I must deny my readership the story. In fact, I must deny it ever happened. Wait – what? Deny what ever happened? What story? What are you talking about?

Onward…

Category Steeple | Tags: | 1 Comment
LAUNCHED: (Mini-)Project Steeple

03.16.2006 by Shannon

Walking to work this morning, I played a game I often play: the “Close Your Eyes and the First Thing You See Upon Opening Them Will Inspire Your Next Piece of Writing” game. And how do I know when to open my eyes? I don’t know. I just do.

The first time I did this I was walking down California St. thinking about a recent post of mine — about being in the library and having a drive-by proselytizing incident. I felt kind of bad about it, like I had given the impression I was anti-religion or something. I’m not. I’m just a “jerk” about personal space, is all.

So I closed my eyes hard, as is the game, then opened: St. Mary’s Church. Akin to breaking open a fortune cookie, getting an unsatisfactory fortune and so deciding to go in for another cookie, I closed my eyes again.

This time I was walking through Chinatown, along Grant Street. I closed my eyes, and left them closed longer, thinking “length of time” would equal “quality of result.” I was just beginning to feel my eye muscles scrunch in disorientation when SPLAT! A raindrop fell right between my eyes like a bindi. I thought that was a good sign to open them.

And speaking of signs, I opened them to a 2-foot-tall ceramic Jesus with flames coming out of his head. I was so alarmed that I quickly closed my eyes again, and opened them back up just as rapidly: only to come face-to-face with a homeless man in a neon orange vest. He looked at me and said “it’s all garbage.”

I opened my eyes wide and then realized he was, in fact, cleaning garbage. I blinked. But what was he sweeping into his trash bin but a piece of paper with my name on it. I freaked out, closed my eyes without even knowing what I was doing, opened them and looked: across the street was a sign that read “Open Now, 24!”

Now, just below the “24″ was the scribbled word “hours” indicating, of course, that this restaurant was open 24 hours. But my nickname at work is “24″ and I’ll be damned if I wasn’t playing the “Open Your Eyes” game. I knew what this meant.

I closed my eyes again, one last time, to quadruple check. For good measure. Just to be sure. When I opened them again, I saw a priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar.

I’m kidding. I opened up my eyes and just saw the city. Nothing special. Streets. Closed shops. People. An old woman approaching me, leaning on a cane, talking to another old lady friend. The first old lady tripped on a crack in the sidewalk, and faltered.

“Jesus-frickin’-Christ,” she mumbled. That was it. I knew what I had to do. I mean, all the signs added up: a church, a flaming Jesus head, my name in the garbage, my nickname with a call to action, and a swearing old lady.

I have to go back to church.

Launching mini-project Project Steeple, an exercise where over an indeterminate number of Sundays with absolutely no time or writing parameters, I will try my hand at exposing myself to various religions / philosophies around San Francisco.

God willing.

Category Steeple, This Modern Life | Tags: | 4 Comments
Untitling

03.14.2006 by Shannon

I once had a shirt in Jr. High School that said “Respect the Circle of Life” and this picture:

I was reminded of it today when I had coffee and cigarettes for lunch with a friend. We talked about how we love it when you eat a lot of salt & vinegar potato chips and your mouth turns white. Then we talked about how shitty it was that probably one day one of us would be dead. Then we talked about how depressing it was that even if you find / have found your soul mate, it probably won’t work out because why should it? Life isn’t a movie. Then we talked about goat yogurt.

I like life. It’s kind of fucked up and charming in its own way.

Category This Modern Life | Tags: | 1 Comment
A Dispatch from the Library

03.12.2006 by Shannon

Dear Book-Nerd Readers,

There’s something wonderful about a library, don’t you think? And I don’t mean all the books and learning and shit. I mean that it commands its own quiet energy, connecting yet un-intrusive; that although this is a public space, there is a kind of imposed isolation, too. It’s the quiet:

“I am sitting next to you, and we are connected in this way, but you are under no circumstance permitted to talk to me. Because this is a li(shhh!)brary, that’s why.”

There’s beauty in that. It’s the same reason why I secretly think the iPod is so popular: headphones.

Everyone, in a library, is free to feel safe to go about his or her business ( “I’m into beat poetry. You’re into civil war anthologies? Great” ) without feeling obligated to mind the Other — which is rare in a city — and in this way there is perhaps a more genuine connection between civil members of a collective group through isolated co-habitation of thepublicsphereheretofore –

oh-my-god-you’ll-never-guess-what-just-happened.

So, I’m sitting in the SF Public Library, right? I mean, really, I’m just sitting here working on a book review I’d like to publish — and then, of course, I’ve allowed myself to get distracted with posting to my blog about the Inherent Goodness of Libraries (see above) — when this guy, my age, friendly-looking, walks over to where I’m sitting, doesn’t look at me, but sets a book down beside me.

I don’t look over, thinking, you know, he’s just putting a book down and plans to sit there and, um… read. Like what you do in a library. Then he walks away. Sure. He’s going to go look for something else but is just “saving his spot,” right? He walks around the library, sort of eyeing me, as if he’s watching to see if I noticed him, or his book. I can feel his gaze on me. Then he leaves leaves. Like, walks across to the elevators, pushes the down button, the doors slide open, he gets in, looks at me hard one last time, the doors slice closed, and he’s gone.

I look over at the book, and it’s a thick edition of MORMONISM – STUDY EDITION. I swear I feel him remotely wanting me to pick it up and have a look –

oh-shit-okay-now-he’s-back. He’s sitting right next to me, and he keeps looking over, wanting, wishing, willing me to make eye contact. I can only imagine what will happen if I do. I. Am. Concentrating. Very. Hard. To. Look. Busy. Okay, I have to end this post now because I swear if he looks over and sees the word “Mormonism” in all caps on my computer screen, I’m screwed.

Signing off,
Shannon

P.S. I hope no one reading this is Mormon / offended.

Category Narrative, San Francisco glory | Tags: | 5 Comments
Because Visuals are Important

03.06.2006 by Shannon

Get motivated!

Category Slinky | Tags: | No Comments
LAUNCHED: Project Slinky

by Shannon

That’s right! We’re embarking upon our next project — I said March was going to be all business, didn’t I? Well, consider this month ripe with the business of fun, creative energy — or something like that.

Not much more time to explain. But I’ve updated the Project page, where you’ll find more on the current project. Or, you can click read the entire Slinky Manifesto, if you so desire.

Happy Monday!

Category Slinky | Tags: | 1 Comment
Because life’s a journey

03.03.2006 by Shannon

And March is the destination.

Speaking of journey-destinations and such, imagine my surprise when — after not thinking of it for close to, say, 15 years? — the movie “Flight of the Navigator” popped into my head. (No, really, it did — just like that).

Perfect! I thought out loud, this is a perfect segway into March!

In case you’re wondering how “Flight of the Navigator” is related to the third month of the calendar year, let me make the connection for you: Flight of the Navigator was created in the 80′s. I was created in the 80′s. I was created in March. Ahhhhh! Getting the gist, now? (Sorry, it’s a lame “gist”).

I had given myself a deadline many years ago by which I had to, er, accomplish something. That thing, so far as I can remember, was to finish a piece of writing of some (some) level of quality, ready to be sent out into the world, for adequate failure. But at least it would be finished! And that deadline? The quarter-of-a-century-age, that significant un car de ciecle: The Big 2-5. Well, it’s here. Nearly.

So, I’m attempting to create something of my own this March to help me along: A Project. What else?

And you? You — you fabulous reader, you? You’re part of it.

Stay tuned.

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